Faith Spilling Over… Into Everyday Life

Why You Need Go-To Girls and How to Get Them


go-to girls“Would this bright, beautiful girl even be interested in spending time with a middle-aged housewife like me?” When I met Bahar, she was a social butterfly with a million friends. I was a stay at home mom overwhelmed by two small kids. I could barely get a shower most days, let alone get outside my house.

I sensed the Lord leading me to encourage younger women in our church, but I didn’t know what to do. I began to pray for a few women and call them occasionally.  The first time I called Bahar, I had to force myself to dial the numbers with sweaty hands.  What if I was bothering her?  What if she really didn’t want to talk to me?

As Bahar and I got to know each other, I discovered we had several interests in common, including a passion for God’s word.  I also realized how much we both needed someone to talk to.  That was ten years ago. Today, she’s one of my go-to girls if I need prayer, a word of advice, or someone to listen.

I’ve seen these scriptures come to life:

“Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help.” Ecclesiastes 4:9–12 

“The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.”  Proverbs 27:9

“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.”  1 Thessalonians 5:11

Many Christian women are isolated and overwhelmed by the demands of caring for our families, our jobs, keeping house, and holding ourselves together. We desperately need fellowship with faith sisters. We need encouragement and accountability, but who has the time?

Our insecurities hold us back. We look at other women and think, “She has it all together. Would she even like me? What do I have to offer?

We don’t realize other women look at us and think the same thing.

Do you have any go-to girls in your life?

If you don’t, how about praying for some? Developing a faith sister relationship is one of the healthiest things you can do for yourself. Consider reaching out more intentionally to a friend you already have or to an acquaintance you’ve felt drawn to.

Three Ways to Make Faith Sister Fellowship Part of Your Life.

Keep it Simple

Start by telephoning that friend more regularly. Meet for lunch once a month. Perhaps you and two friends can make a threesome.

Be Intentional

Have fun with your faith sisters. Laugh with them, but be intentional to forge a spiritual connection.  You might try one of these ideas when you get together:

  • Share prayer requests and pray together.
  • Keep each other accountable to read God’s word daily. Share with each other a favorite scripture you read the past week.
  • Share 3 things you’re thankful for and 2 concerns you have.
  • Take turns choosing a short passage to read together.

Stay Connected

Even if you can only meet once a month, stay connected. Keep in touch by phone or social media. Share prayer needs, and keep praying for each other. Send a text or quick e-mail to cheer your sister on.

Fellowship with faith sisters helps us grow spiritually. We encourage and keep one another accountable. Hopefully we have fun together. Sometimes I laugh to think that my friendship with Bahar started with a phone call I was almost too scared to make!

What about you? Do you have any faith sisters? Is there someone you can encourage with a phone call today?

Linking up with Holly Barrett, Meredith Bernarad, and Holly Gerth. (Check out their blogs for more encouragement!)
Holly Barrett


Author: betsydecruz

I want to enjoy the everyday life God is giving me as best I can, even when the road gets bumpy. I love having fun with my teenagers, learning almost anything, and drinking dark roast coffee with my friends.

21 thoughts on “Why You Need Go-To Girls and How to Get Them

  1. You captured my thoughts so many times as I think about reaching out to someone -what if I’m bothering them, they have plenty of friends so why would they want to add me as one more? Yet community is SO important! I have life group of sweet sisters in faith who have become dear friends and life lines. I’ve been meaning to reach out to a couple of friends, so maybe I’ll do that today – thanks for the encouragement!

    • I’ve thought those things so many times, Kathryn. And STILL DO! But how wonderful when we can get past our own doubts and step out. That’s great that you have a life group of faith sisters.

  2. I followed you on Twitter & scheduled a Tweet to share this on Thursday! Thanks for such an encouraging post, Betsy. Blessings!

  3. A wonderful post offering practical wisdom to establish connections. It is so true … we must be intentional in reaching out to our friends. Life can get so busy & the days will get away from us otherwise. I am so glad to have stopped here from Testimony Tues. this morning. Blessings!

  4. I can relate to so many of the hesitations you and your commenters mention here, Betsy. We hold back out of fear or insecurity and possibly miss out on something (someONE) great. Thanks for your suggestions on how to be intentional about forging these important friendships.

  5. Great reminder, and wonderful suggestions that I really, rally need to implement!! Thank you Betsy!

  6. I love this post, Betsy. I agree that relationships with other women, faith sisters. are very important. We’re emotionally healthier and happier when we can share experiences, and sometimes only another woman can understand.

  7. So, I am smiling today as I am reading your words. It started with your bio and continued with your encouragement. The scriptures are some of my very favorites,as well, but this is a continual discussion I have with the Lord about frienships. The necessity of intentional reaching out to others can be terrifying but unless we make the effort then our relationships are merely acquaintances. As a homeschooling momma, it can be even harder to make those connections and carry through the relationships but it was when I cried out for just a few of those dear hearts to connect with that He brought in God-friends who, like your friend, have become prayer warriors when I need them.
    I appreciated yoru post today, Betsty, and I am thrilled to have found your blog. I look forward to visiting again.

    • So glad you have those go-to girls too, Dawn. It’s true that homeschooling can suck the energy right out of you and make you think you don’t have time, but we do need those relationships! Thanks so m uch for your encouragement and for visiting my blog today.

  8. I have really enjoyed reading this today. I just wish I felt comfortable enough to try and reach out to someone. Thanks for sharing. ~Leigha

  9. I really needed the reminder that ‘faith sisters’ are a good thing and cultivating them in real life is probably a good idea. I’m not much of an extrovert, so the faith sisters I’ve made through blogging have filled an empty spot in my life, but I’m ready to try to make some IRL ones ;)!

  10. I could see myself in so much of this, Betsy. When you live far away from family, your friends really do become your family and I’ve learned how important community is. After a few years in our current location, I finally have those go-to women and I am so grateful. I prayed and prayed and God answered. He is so good. Love this post!

    • Glad you have them, Abby. I’ve also experienced friends who have become family. I guess an across country move–in your case I think–means you need those kind of friends just like I do.

  11. I love my go-to girls! Don’t know what I’d do without them. Great post, today, Betsy! Love the practical suggestions and encouragement!

  12. I have one definite go-to girl and a few periphery ones. I feel like God has been wanting me to reach out to younger moms, but I always have the excuses. “What do I know?” “Who do You have in mind?” I just pray for Him to bring them to me 🙂

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s